Tina Fey Tuesday

Yes, yes, I realize I’m starting to sound like a broken record. Tina Fey = Tina Awesome. Lather, rinse, repeat. But today I’m all about sharing the Tina love with other hilarious women. You see, Vanity Fair finally rebutted its own beyond insulting essay from January 2007, “Why Women Aren’t Funny.” Whatever you do, don’t read it without blood pressure medication on hand. A year and three months later, the magazine has finally responded to its own outrageous claim with an Annie Leibovitz lensed cover story titled “Who Says Women Aren’t Funny?” Assembled, along with Tina, are some of the hottest (both career-wise and looks-wise, as the article pointedly observes) female comics around. God, there’s not much sexier than a smart, funny woman, is there? Also, how much do I love Amy Poehler copping a feel on the cover? Nice.Now, I really don’t know where this whole “women aren’t funny” bullshit came from. In fact growing up, I didn’t even realize this was a stereotype. I mean, I’d heard about the humorless feminists and uptight schoolmarm types. But all of womankind? None of us are funny? I guess I was just raised in one of those sheltered environment where my parents and friends told me that a woman could be anything she wanted to be, including funny.For a more thorough analysis of the article, check out AfterEllen later today. But for now, can we please just enjoy women being funny with other women? Seriously, I’ve got to Weekend Crush like six of these women immediately.


p.s. How does one become a faux boob tattoo appliquér because this is a job I think I could really excel at?

UPDATE: See the hotness and hilarity in glorious hi-res over at Popbytes.

Ladies’ Month

This one is, as they say, for the ladies. Yes, we’ve officially entered Women’s History Month. Wow, a whole month devoted to sugar and spice and everything nice. To celebrate, I bring you three fantastic videos featuring us dames. We are your rock stars, feminist icons, your potential lesbians, yearning to breathe free. And, yes, we totally kick ass.

Jem is truly, truly, truly Le Tigre-tastic.

Outrageous? No. Awesome? Yes.

No, my first name ain’t baby.

Let’s all make a vow to eat constantly, kick ass and look good. (Don’t let Coulter scare you away, it’s so worth the click.)

And I was like, aaahhhhhhh!

Oh, that Ellen Page. What a fun and positive way to poke back at all the gay speculation swirling around her of late. And, seriously, why does everything have to have a frickin’ label? Why can’t we all just hug a woman with our legs in friendship? In fact, in honor of Ladies’ Month, I think I’m going to go do that right now.

Tina Fey Tuesday

Where my bitches at? Oh, come on, you knew that was coming. Tina Fey’s triumphant return to “Saturday Night Live” this past weekend featured the most bitchin’ feminist rants on the show since, well, since Amy Poehler berated today’s starlets for not having lady gardens anymore. In a genius and succinct stint at the Weekend Update desk, Tina both presented and shot down all the trite arguments against voting for Hillary Clinton.

On post-feminism: “Women today feel perfectly free to make whatever choice Oprah tells them to.” On a co-presidency: “Because that would be terrible, having two intelligent, qualified people working together to solve problems. Ewwh. Why would you let Starsky talk to Hutch?” On not wanting to see an old lady: “Really, they didn’t seem to mind when Ronald Reagan did that.” And, best of all, on the bitch thing: “Yeah, she is. And so am I. And so is this one. You know what? Bitches get stuff done.”

I have it on good authority [hat tip, Lex!] that during rehearsals Tina got her groove thing on between skits with cast members. Oh, to see Tina shake her money maker live. I’m going to need to take a moment. Also, apparently, one of the jokes cut from her Weekend Update bit involved a transgender male-to-female woman who has been hassled on the subway. Tina said the woman was suing the MTA for harassment because she was called “a dyke instead of her proper name, Ms. Fey.”

While the rest of the show was a tad hit-and-miss, Tina’s presence gave the series its strongest rating in two years, not to mention the strong female voice it so often lacks. The monologue? Adorable. The Annuale commercial? Well, the Annuale commercial needs to be seen to be believed. Just hold onto your fucking hat.

God, I could not love her more. I mean it. It’s not even remotely possible. I always knew Tina would be a Hillary backer. And, as Scribe suggested yesterday, I say we hold a special election to crown Tina Queen of the Fucking Universe. Bitch is the new black! Join the movement. Us bitches got to stick together.

p.s. Does anyone else think Tina made this final shot specifically for us, her lesbian fans? I mean, she knows we’re out there. And she is wearing her famous bi-curious shoes. Intentional or not, a grateful nation universe of gay ladies thanks you, Tina Fey. See what I was saying about that Queen of the Fucking Universe thing? Bitches in ’08!

[Hat tip, Tina Fey Daily for the SNL promo card caps!]

Ladies, you need to cool it...

After all this talk about fake skit comedy shows, the real deal pulls through. Last weekend, SNL's Amy Poehler had her say about stars flashing their business all over town. Lady garden, snicker.

UPDATE: The clip is dead, please enjoy this partial transcript. Lady garden gets me every single time.

Speaking of Britney Spears, I’d just like to take a minute to address this latest trend: flashing your business while coming and/or leaving a limousine. Ladies, you need to cool it. Nobody wants to see your baby factory…What’s next? Shots of stars pooping out of a window?

And lastly, ladies, what’s up with all the deforestation going on down there? You need hair down there! It’s a backup system for underwear! Even when you’re showing it, you’re not really showing it! There was a time when a lady garden was as big as a slice of New York pizza. Then it turned into an upside down John Waters mustache!